A team that talks together stays together
No one is immune to the ups and downs right now. Good moments and bad moments. There is a lot of flatness right now. I feel it in myself, and I hear it in others. How are you doing? It’s more than ok to acknowledge that this is tough for you. Leadership is challenging enough, and no manual will give you the answers to this scenario.
Think about your team.
People are hard to read. And people are even harder to read right now. Your team are dispersed, you see them on Zoom, but you can’t really ‘see’ them. Their eyes, their energy is harder to read, to pick up on. Perhaps it’s the digital and the distance, and perhaps people are just hiding things better. Many people are flat, and this flatness can come across as getting on with things. However, it can also hide a lot in the unsaid.
As a leader, how do you check in on your team? You are there to make people feel supported. Showing that you ‘see’ your colleagues means so much. There’s no need for big gestures. There’s no need for in-depth conversations. Focus on what you do and say more and with a few slight changes, you’ll find that people will be more responsive to you and more honest in their discussions.
What Else?
Asking the right questions is vitally important. I like to ask people ‘what else?’. It’s an open question. They can’t get away with a yes or no answer.
It offers the person you’re talking to more space. Often that’s when you find out what’s really going on, what they’re stuck on, what’s frustrating them. And they can always say there’s nothing else.
One client who manages a tech company said he couldn’t believe how powerful that question was. His FD finally told him what was really going on both within his team and at home for him right now. He said “I felt a bit of a fraud. I didn’t do anything, just asked that simple question, but I could tell he felt heard and we moved a lot of things on in a short conversation”.
One at a Time
Take care not to fire off questions in quick succession. How’s the project? How do you feel it’s progressing? Is it all going to plan? This rapid-fire approach is more likely to get fewer answers than the in-depth discussion you want.
This bombardment is overwhelming. Where does someone begin to answer all these questions?
Take it slowly and ask one question at a time. Give your colleague the time and space to answer fully. More often than not, they will tell you everything you need to know (and probably more).
Don’t Give the Answer
Don’t underestimate the power of pauses. Ask the question and then stop. The temptation is to say ‘How are things going? We’re on the right track?’. You aren’t giving the person a chance to speak. In fact, they are just going to agree with you and say yes – even if that isn’t the answer they were going to give.
Pause and give space. You may not be reading the situation as well as you think you can right now, so let people tell you what’s going on.
Bounce Around
A team Zoom meeting can allow people to go unnoticed. Some people are happy to do the talking while others sit back and let them. As a leader, you are there to encourage full participation and hear everybody’s opinions, so bounce the question around.
Ask the question to one person. Listen to that answer. Then ask the same question to somebody else. Or, if you want to see if there is a difference in opinion or you want to hear slightly different feedback try this approach.
‘Jack said he thought the project was lagging behind due to the building team. Beth, can you think of any other reasons why the project isn’t progressing?’
Here you are inviting others to participate. You are still focusing on the issue, but you are re-wording what others have said, which is great because it proves you are listening. And, then you use other people’s feedback to find out more from different members of the team.
Nothing is stopping you from bouncing the question on again. It’s a questioning technique used in classrooms to encourage all students to participate, and it has relevance in a business setting if appropriately adapted.
Create a Team
The Harvard Business Review identifies four reasons why people hold meetings: to influence others, to make decisions, to solve problems, or to strengthen relationships. Strengthening relationships via a computer screen is proving tricky, but this is our reality and, as leaders, we all understand the importance of nurturing a strong team relationship. Without a relationship, people cannot and will not work together successfully.
For a meeting to be successful, voluntary engagement has to be prioritised by everyone. However, I appreciate that as 2020 drags on, this isn’t always the case, and it’s your role to encourage discussion and make people feel they are still part of a team. Shifts happens when you can acknowledge that you have to take the lead and then make a choice about how you want to approach a situation. You must decide how you want to behave. How are you showing up in these meetings?
Acknowledging your own behaviour is step one in starting to make a shift. Your approach will influence the outcomes and how you and others will feel. Step two is asking good questions. Ask the right questions. Ask the same questions to different people. And listen to the answers. Your team will respond accordingly.
Finally, focus on yourself. Ask yourself those right questions. Listen to your answers and understand how you are feeling about things. If you are at the top of the company, nobody else will be doing this for you right now.
If that’s difficult or you don’t have the tools to listen to yourself, call me. I work with business leaders equipping them with the tools to lead successfully and communicate positively.
Let’s start now.
How are you?
https://hbr.org/2020/03/how-to-get-people-to-actually-participate-in-virtual-meetings
https://www.teachertoolkit.co.uk/2011/11/04/pose-pause-bounce-pounce/